The Beauty in the Ruins: A Queer Middle Age Man Reflection on Love, Loss, and Longing
Most people don’t get it — not really. But for someone like me, a queer man whose heart beats in fashion and dreams in color, inspiration can arrive from the most unexpected corners. This time, it came from Rome. Or rather, Emily in Paris , Episode 10, Season 4. Who would’ve thought a binge-watch would crack open something in me? I didn’t expect to fall for Italy all over again. But suddenly, I was there again — lost in the echo of Rome’s ancient ruins, my breath taken away by a pizza in Venice, and Florence... oh Florence, where even the air feels like poetry. It wasn’t just the cities. It was the flirtatious charm of Italian men. The ease in their smiles. The casual way they make you feel wanted — even if just for a moment. And that’s when it hit me — something I’ve never dared say out loud. I've never been in love. Not once. And yet, I've never felt truly lonely either. Strange, right? Still, there’s a kind of ache, watching lovers chase each other with reckless abandon ...